I am so happy. Even now, when I can feel my freak outs in the back of my mind, I can keep them at bay. Every once and a while it bubbles up and I feel a taste of the out of control and lost person I was for such a long time, but really I'm happy. My friends, my family, and everything in my life now makes me happy instead of sad. I feel like I did first semester freshman year. I AM.
And that's enough for me. If anyone has ever read the book Bloomability, there is a character who just yells "Viva! Viva!" whenever he feels really alive and happy. And I feel like yelling it to. I am finally, finally starting to be okay just BEING. It's weird, and sounds really trippy, but it's getting there.

I'm so excited for the rest of my life.